Great emails....wanted to share them

For those of you who do not know Beth Moore, she is an outstanding Bible
teacher, writer of Bible studies, and is a married mother of two daughters.

This is one of her experiences:

April 20, 2005, at the Airport in Knoxville, waiting to board the
plane, I had the Bible on my lap and was very intent upon what I was
doing. I'd had a marvelous morning with the Lord. I say this because I
want to tell you it is a scary thing to have the Spirit of God really
working in you.


You could end up doing some things you never would have done otherwise.
Life in the Spirit can be dangerous for a thousand reasons not the least
of which is your ego.

I tried to keep from staring, but he was such a strange sight. Humped
over in a wheelchair, he was skin and bones, dressed in clothes that
obviously fit when he was at least twenty pounds heavier His knees
protruded from his trousers, and his shoulders looked like the coat
hanger was still in his shirt. His hands looked like tangled masses of
veins and bones.


The strangest part of him was his hair and nails. Stringy, gray hair
hung well over his shoulders and down part of his back. His fingernails
were long, clean but strangely out of place on an old man.

I looked down at my Bible as fast as I could, discomfort burning my
face. As I tried to imagine what his story might have been, I found
myself wondering if I'd just had a Howard Hughes sighting. Then, I
remembered that he was dead. So this man in the airport... an
impersonator maybe? Was a camera on us somewhere? There I sat; trying
to concentrate on the Word to keep from being concerned about a thin
slice of humanity served up on a wheelchair only a few seats from me.
All the while, my heart was growing more and more overwhelmed with a
feeling for him.

Let's admit it. Curiosity is a heap more comfortable than true concern,
and suddenly I was awash with aching emotion for this bizarre-looking
old man.

I had walked with God long enough to see the handwriting on the wall.
I've learned that when I begin to feel what God feels, something so
contrary to my natural feelings, something dramatic is bound to happen.
And it may be embarrassing.

I immediately began to resist because I could feel God working on my
spirit and I started arguing with God in my mind. 'Oh, no, God, please,
no.' I looked up at the ceiling as if I could stare straight through it
into heaven and said, 'Don't make me witness to this man. Not right here
and now. Please. I'll do anything. Put me on the same plane, but don't
make me get up here and witness to this man in front of this gawking
audience. Please, Lord!'

There I sat in the blue vinyl chair begging His Highness, 'Please don't
make me witness to this man. Not now. I'll do it on the plane.' Then I
heard it...'I don't want you to witness to him. I want you to brush his
hair.'

The words were so clear, my heart leap into my throat, and my thoughts
spun like a top. Do I witness to the man or brush his hair? No-brainier.
I looked straight back up at the ceiling and said, 'God, as I live and
breathe, I want you to know I am ready to witness to this man. I'm on
this Lord. I'm your girl! You've never seen a woman witness to a man
faster in your life. What difference does it make if his hair is a mess if he is
not redeemed? I am going to witness to this man' Again as clearly as
I've ever heard an audible word, God seemed to write this statement
across the wall of my mind. 'That is not what I said, Beth. I don't want you to
witness to him. I want you to go brush his hair.'

I looked up at God and quipped, 'I don't have a hairbrush. It's in my
suitcase on the plane. How am I supposed to brush his hair without a
hairbrush?' God was so insistent that I almost involuntarily began to
walk toward him as these thoughts came to me from God's word: 'I will
thoroughly furnish you unto all good works.' (2 Timothy 3:17)

I stumbled over to the wheelchair thinking I could use one myself. Even
as I retell this story, my pulse quickens and I feel those same
butterflies. I knelt down in front of the man and asked as demurely as
possible, 'Sir, may I have the pleasure of brushing your hair?'

He looked back at me and said, 'What did you say?'

'May I have the pleasure of brushing your hair?'

To which he responded in volume ten, 'Little lady, if you expect me to
hear you, you're going to have to talk louder than that.'

At this point, I took a deep breath and blurted out , 'SIR, MAY I HAVE
THE PLEASURE OF BRUSHING YOUR HAIR?' At which point every eye in the
place darted right at me. I was the only thing in the room looking more
peculiar than old Mr. Long Locks. Face crimson and forehead breaking out
in a sweat, I watched him look up at me with absolute shock on his face,
and say, 'If you really want to.' Are you kidding? Of course I didn't
want to. But God didn't seem interested in my personal preference right
about then. He pressed on my heart until I could utter the words, 'Yes,
sir, I would be pleased. But I have one little problem. I don't have a
hairbrush.' 'I have one in my bag,' he responded.

I went around to the back of that wheelchair, and I got on my hands and
knees and unzipped the stranger's old carry-on, hardly believing what I
was doing. I stood up and started brushing the old man's hair. It was
perfectly clean, but it was tangled and matted. I don't do many things
well, but must admit I've had notable experience untangling knotted hair
mothering two little girls. Like I'd done with either Amanda or Melissa
in such a condition, I began brushing at the very bottom of the strands,
remembering to take my time not to pull. A miraculous thing happened to
me as I started brushing that old man's hair. Everybody else in the room
disappeared. There was no one alive for those moments except that old
man and me. I brushed and I brushed and I brushed until every tangle was

out of that hair. I know this sounds so strange, but I've never felt that kind of

love for another soul in my entire life. I believe with all my heart, I - for that

few minutes - felt a portion of the very love of God. That He had overtaken

my heart for a little while like someone renting a room and making Himself

at home for a short while.

The emotions were so strong and so pure t hat I knew they had to be
God's. His hair was finally as soft and smooth as an infant's.

I slipped the brush back in the bag and went around the chair to face
him. I got back down on my knees, put my hands on his knees and said,
'Sir, do you know my Jesus?'

He said, 'Yes, I do' Well, that figures, I thought. He explained, 'I've
known Him since I married my bride. She wouldn't marry
me until I got to know the Savior.' He said, 'You see, the problem is, I
haven't seen my bride in months. I've had open-heart surgery, and she's
been too ill to come see me. I was sitting here thinking to myself, what
a mess I must be for my bride.'

Only God knows how often He allows us to be part of a divine moment when
we're completely unaware of the significance. This, on the other hand,
was one of those rare encounters when I knew God had intervened in
details only He could have known. It was a God moment, and I'll never
forget it.



Our time came to board, and we were not on the same plane. I was deeply
ashamed of how I'd acted earlier and would have been so proud to have
accompanied him on that aircraft.

I still had a few minutes, and as I gathered my things to board, the
airline hostess returned from the corridor, tears streaming down her
cheeks. She said, 'That old man's sitting on the plane, sobbing. Why did
you do that? What made you do that?'

I said, 'Do you know Jesus? He can be the bossiest thing!'

And we got to share.

I learned something about God that day. He knows if you're exhausted,
you're hungry, you're serving in the wrong place or it is time to move
on but you feel too responsible to budge. He knows if you're hurting or
feeling rejected. He knows if you're sick or drowning under a wave of
temptation. Or He knows if you just need your hair brushed. He sees you
as an individual. Tell Him your need!

I got on my own flight, sobs choking my throat, wondering how many
opportunities just like that one had I missed along the way . . all
because I didn't want people to think I was strange. God didn't send me
to that old man. He sent that old man to me.

Friends, this is my Uncle Ray's idea. Don't know how he came up with the date and time. Said he felt convicted to get as many people to pray at the same time, as possible.

"On Wednesday October 29, 2008, at 11:17am stop for a few seconds and pray that God will bless and protect the United States of America.

Send this to as many people as you can."

So, I'm doing my part by marking my calendar and passing it on. Hope you'll do the same.

Thanks,

Taryn

This is one of the best prayers I think I have ever read.



I started not to do this, but as I read it, I understood God to Say, 'You need a miracle tomorrow'...so here goes...
Prov. 29:25... You never know when God is going to bless you! Good things happen when you least expect them to!!!!
Change the number in the subject box when you forward it by adding one.

If you prayed this prayer, change the number in the subject box before forwarding the message so people can see how many people have done so. God Bless!!!!!!!!!!!
Just repeat this phrase and see how God moves: God I love you and I need you, come into my heart, please.



Pass this message and you will be blessed and know that you are already blessed by the person who sent this to you.

POST OFFICE

Write on the back of your envelopes or on the front! We think this is a great idea.
We'll start writing it in the front of our envelopes. Including our Bills

You may have heard in the news that a couple of Post Offices in Texas have been forced to take down small posters that say 'IN GOD WE TRUST' The law, they say, is being violated.

Anyway, we heard proposed on a radio station show, that we should all write 'IN GOD WE TRUST' on the back of all our mail. After all, that's our National Motto, and it's on all the money we use to buy those stamps. We think it's a wonderful idea.

We must take back our nation from all the people who think that anything that offends them should be removed.

If you like this idea, please pass it on and DO IT. The idea of writing or stamping 'IN GOD WE TRUST' on our envelopes sounds good to us .WE'RE HAVING A STAMP MADE TOO! Heck, lets use it as our signature on e-mails too!

It's been reported that 86% of Americans believe in God. Therefore, we have a very hard time understanding why there's such a mess about having 'In God We Trust!' on our money and having God in the pledge of allegiance.

Could it be that WE just need to take action and tell the 14% to 'sit down and shut up'?

If you agree, pass this on, if not, delete!!! But Remember if you delete this, That's 1 reason why this world is in the mess we're in now. We Sit Back & Let It Happen!!

In God We Trust
________________________________________________________________

You were chosen to receive this novena.

The moment you receive it,

say :

Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be Thy name, Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven, give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen.

GOD WANTS TO TELL YOU, It shall be well with you this coming year.

No matter how much your enemies try this year, they will not succeed.

You have been destined to make it and you shall surely achieve all your goals this year.

For the remainder of 2008 and all of 2009, all your agonies will be diverted and victory and prosperity will be incoming in abundance.. Today God has confirmed the end of your sufferings, sorrows and pain because HE that sits on the throne has remembered you. He has taken away the hardships and given you JOY. He will never let you down. I knocked at heaven's door this morning, God asked me.. My child! What can I do for you? And I said, 'Father, please protect and bless the person reading this message... ' This is a Novena from Mother Theresa that started in 1952. Send it to your friends and family so that they may have these blessings also. This is a powerful Novena. Couldn't hurt. Can only help. Please do not break it..

THE LORD'S BASEBALL GAME

Freddy and the Lord stood by to observe a baseball game. The Lord's team was playing Satan's team.

The Lord's team was at bat, the score was tied zero to zero, and it was the bottom of the 9th inning with two outs. They continued to watch as a batter stepped up to the plate named 'Love.'

Love swung at the first pitch and hit a single, because "Love never fails."

The next batter was named Faith, who also got a single because Faith works with Love.

The next batter up was named Godly Wisdom. Satan wound up and threw the first pitch.


Godly Wisdom looked it over and let it pass: Ball one. Three more pitches and Godly Wisdom walked because he never swings at what Satan throws.


The bases were now loaded. The Lord then turned to Freddy and told him He was now
going to bring in His starplayer. Up to the plate stepped Grace. Freddy said, "He sure doesn't look like much!"

Satan's whole team relaxed when they saw Grace.
Thinking he had won the game, Satan wound up and fired his first pitch. To the shock of everyone, Grace hit the ball harder than anyone had ever seen! But Satan was not worried; his center fielder let very few get by.



He went up for the ball, but it went right through his glove, hit him on the head and sent him crashing on the ground;

the roaring crowds went wild as the ball





continued over the fence . . .. for a home run!


The Lord's team wn!

The Lord then asked Freddy if he knew why Love, Faith and Godly Wisdom could get on base but couldn't win the game. Freddy answered that he didn't know why.

The Lord explained, "If your love, faith and wisdom had won the game, you would think you had done it by yourself. Love, Faith and Wisdom will get you on base but only My Grace can get you Home:

Read the next question before looking at the response for this one.





Question 2:
It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote counts.
Here are the facts about the three candidates. Who would you vote for?


Candidate A.

Associates with crooked politicians, and consults with astrologist.
He's had two mistresses. He also chain smokes and drinks 8 to 10 martinis a day.


Candidate B.

He was kicked out of office twice, sleeps until noon , used opium in
college and drinks a quart of whiskey every evening.


Candidate C

He is a decorated war hero. He's a vegetarian, doesn't smoke, drinks an
occasional beer and never cheated on his wife.





Which of these candidates would be our choice?





Decide first... no peeking, then scroll down for the response..




Candidate A is Franklin D. Roosevelt.
Candidate B is Winston Churchill.
Candidate C is Adolph Hitler.





And, by the way, on your answer to the abortion question:

If you said YES, you just killed Beethoven.




Pretty interesting isn't it? Makes a person think before judging someone.


Wait till you see the end of this note! Keep reading..



Never be afraid to try something new.



Remember:

Amateurs...built the ark.
Professionals...built the Titanic


And Finally, can you imagine working for a company that has a little more
than 500 employees and has the following statistics:

* 29 have been accused of spousal abuse
* 7 have been arrested for fraud
* 19 have been accused of writing bad checks
* 117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses
* 3 have done time for assault
* 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit
* 14 have been arrested on drug-related charges
* 8 have been arrested for shoplifting
* 21 are currently defendants in lawsuits
* 84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last year...


Can you guess which organization this is?



Give up yet?




It's the 535 members of the United States Congress.

The same group that crank out hundreds of new laws each year designed to
keep the rest of us in line.

Psalm 55:22
'Friends are God's way of taking care of us.'
This was written by a of Metro Denver Hospice Physician:

I was driving home from a meeting this evening about 5, stuck in traffic on Colorado Blvd., and the car started to choke and splutter and die - I barely managed to coast, cursing, into a gas station, glad only that I would not be blocking traffic and would have a somewhat warm spot to wait for the tow truck. It wouldn't even turn over. Before I could make the call, I saw a woman walking out of the 'quickie mart' building, and it looked like she slipped on some ice and fell into a gas pump, so I got out to see if she was okay.

When I got there, it looked more like she had been overcome by sobs that she had fallen; she was a young woman who looked really haggard with dark circles under her eyes. She dropped something as I helped her up, and I picked it up to give it to her. It was a nickel.

At that moment, everything came into focus for me: the crying woman, the ancient Suburban crammed full of stuff with 3 kids in the back (1 in a car seat), and the gas pump reading $4.95.

I asked her if she was okay and if she needed help, and she just kept saying 'I don't want my kids to see me crying,' so we stood on the other side of the pump from her car. She said she was driving to California and that things were very hard for her right now. So I asked, 'And you were praying?' That made her back away from me a little, but I assured her I was not a crazy person and said, 'He heard you, and He sent me.'

I took out my card and swiped it through the card reader on the pump so she could fill up her car completely, and while it was fueling, walked to the next door - McDonald's and bought 2 big bags of food, some gift certificates for more, and a big cup of coffee. She gave the food to the kids in the car, who attacked it like wolves, and we stood by the pump eating fries and talking a little.

She told me her name, and that she lived in Kansas City. Her boyfriend left 2 months ago and she had not been able to make ends meet. She knew she wouldn't have money to pay rent Jan 1, and finally in desperation had finally called her parents, with whom she had not spoken in about 5 years. They lived in California and said she could come live with them and try to get on her feet there.

So she packed up everything she owned in the car She told the kids they were going to California for Christmas, but not that they were going to live there.

I gave her my gloves, a little hug and said a quick prayer with her for safety on the road. As I was walking over to my car, she said, 'So, are you like an angel or something?'

This definitely made me cry. I said, 'Sweetie, at this time of year angels are really busy, so sometimes God uses regular people.'

It was so incredible to be a part of someone else's miracle. And of course, you guessed it, when I got in my car it started right away and got me home with no problem. I'll put it in the shop tomorrow to check, but I suspect the mechanic won't find anything wrong.

Sometimes the angels fly close enough to you that you can hear the flutter of their wings...

Psalms 55:22 'Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and He shall sustain thee. He shall never suffer the righteous to be moved.'

My instructions were to pick four people that I wanted God to bless, especially for the months in 2008 , and I picked you.

Please pass this to four people you want to be blessed and a copy back to me.


Here is the prayer:

'Father, I ask You to bless my children, grandchildren, friends, relatives and email buddies reading this right now. Show them a new revelation of your love and power. Holy Spirit, I ask You to minister to their spirit this very moment. Where there is pain, give them Your peace and mercy. Where there is self doubt, release a renewed confidence through Your grace, In Jesus' precious name. Amen.'

I know I picked more than four -- you can, too.
When Satan is knocking at your door, simply say, 'Jesus, could You please get that for me.


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A great story

I left work early so I could have some uninterrupted study time right before the final in my Youth Issues class. When I got to class, everybody was doing their last minute studying. The teacher came in and said he would review with us for just a little bit
before the test. We went through the review, most of it right on the study guide, but there were some things he was reviewing that I had never heard of. When questioned about it, he said that they were in the book and we were responsible for everything in the book. We couldn't really argue with that.

Finally it was time to take the test.

"Leave them face down on the desk until everyone has one and I'll tell you to start," our prof instructed.

When we turned them over, every answer on the test was filled in! The bottom of the last page said the following:

"This is the end of the Final Exam. All the answers on your test are correct. You will receive an 'A' on the final exam. The reason you passed the test is because the creator of the test took it for you. All the work you did in preparation for this test did not help you get the A. You have just experienced...grAce."

He then went around the room and asked each student individually, "What is your grade? Do you deserve the grade you are receiving? How much did all your studying for this exam help you achieve your final grade?"

Now I am not a crier by any stretch of the imagination, but I had to fight back tears when answering those questions and thinking about how the Creator has passed the test for me.

Discussion afterward went like this: "I have tried to teach you all semester that you are a recipient of grace. I've tried to communicate to you that you need to demonstrate this gift as you work with young people. Don't hammer them; they are not the enemy. Help them, for they will carry on your ministry if it is full of GRACE!"

Talking about how some of us had probably studied hours and some just a few minutes but had all received the same grade, he pointed to a story Jesus told in Matthew 20. The owner of a vineyard hired people to work in his field and agreed to pay them a
certain amount. Several different times during the day, he hired more workers. When it was time to pay them, they all received the same amount. When the ones who had been hired first thing in the morning began complaining, the boss said, "Should you be angry
because I am kind?" (Matthew 20:15).

The teacher said he had never done this kind of final before and probably would never do it again, but because of the content of many of our class discussions, he felt like we needed to experience grace.

Have you thanked your Creator today because of the grace you've experienced?

While watching a little TV on Sunday instead of going to church, I watched
a Church in Atlanta honoring one of its senior pastors who had been
retired many years. He was 92 at that time and I wondered why the Church
even bothered to ask the old gentleman to preach at that age. After a
warm welcome, introduction of this speaker, and as the applause quieted
down he rose from his high back chair and walked slowly, with great
effort and a sliding gate to the podium. Without a note or written paper
of any kind he placed bo th hands on the pulpit to steady himself and
then quietly and slowly he began to speak....
'When I was asked to come here today and talk to you, your pastor asked me
to tell you what was the greatest lesson ever learned in my 50 odd years
of preaching. I thought about it for a few days and boiled it down to
just one thing that made the most difference in my life and sustained me
through all
my trials. The one thing that I could always rely on when tears and
heartbreak and pain and fear and sorrow paralyzed me... the only thing
that would comfort was this verse.........

'Jesus loves me this I know.
For the Bible tells me so.
Little ones to Him belong,
we are weak but He is strong.....
Yes, Jesus loves me...
The Bible tells me so.'

When he finished, the church was quiet. You actually could hear his foot
steps as he shuffled back to his chair. I don't believe I will ever forget
it.

A preacher once stated, 'I always noticed that it was the adults who chose
the children's hymn 'Jesus Loves Me' (for the children of course) during a
hymn sing, and it was the adults who sang the loudest because I could see
they knew it the best.'

'Senior version of Jesus Loves Me'

Here is a new version just for us who have white hair or no hair at all.
For us over middle age (or even those almost there) and all you others
check out this newest version of Jesus Loves Me.

JESUS LOVES ME
Jesus loves me, this I know,
Though my hair is white as snow
Though my sight is growing dim,
Still He bids me trust in Him.


(CHORUS)
YES, JESUS LOVES ME.. YES, JESUS LOVES ME..
YES, JESUS LOVES ME FOR THE BIBLE TELLS ME SO.

Though my steps are oh, so slow,
With my hand in His I'll go
On through life, let come what may,
He'll be there to lead the way.

(CHORUS)


When the nights are dark and long,
In my heart He puts a song.
Telling me in words so clear,
'Have no fear, for I am near.'< /B>


(CHORUS)


When my work on earth is done,
And life's victories have been won.
He will take me home above,
Then I'll understand His love


(CHORUS)


I love Jesus, does He know?
Have I ever told Him so?
Jesus loves to hear me say,
That I love Him every day.


(CHORUS)

If you think this is neat, please pass it on to your friends. If you do
not pass it on, nothing bad will happen, but you will have missed an
opportunity to 'Reach out and Touch' a friend or a loved one.

God Bless Us All!!!

HANDY LITTLE CHART
God has a positive answer:

YOU SAY	GOD SAYS	BIBLE VERSES
You say: 'It's impossible'	God says: All things are possible	(Luke 18:27)
You say: 'I'm too tired'	God says: I will give you rest	(Matthew 11:28-30)
You say: 'Nobody really loves me'	God says: I love you	(John 3:1 6 & John 3:34 )
You say: 'I can't go on'	God says: My grace is sufficient	(II Corinthians 12:9 & Psalm 91:15)
You say: 'I can't figure things out'	God says: I will direct your steps	(Proverbs 3:5- 6)
You say: 'I can't do it'	God says: You can do all things	(Philippians 4:13)
You say: 'I'm not able'	God says: I am able	(II Corinthians 9:
You say: 'It's not worth it'	God says: It will be worth it	(Roman 8:28 )
You say: 'I can't forgive myself'	God says: I Forgive you	(I John 1:9 & Romans 8:1)
You say: 'I can't manage'	God says: I will supply all your needs	(Philippians 4:19)
You say: 'I'm afraid'	God says: I have not given you a spirit of fear	(II Timothy 1:7)
You say: 'I'm always worried and frustrated'	God says: Cast all your cares on ME	(I Peter 5:7)
You say: 'I'm not smart enough'	God says: I give you wisdom	(I Corinthians 1:30)
You say: 'I feel all alone'	God says: I will never leave you or forsake you	(Hebrews 13:5)

HIGH SCHOOL -- 1959 vs 2009


Scenario 1:

Jack goes quail hunting before school and then pulls into the school parking lot with his shotgun in his truck's gun rack.

1959 - Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack's shotgun, goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.

2009 - School goes into lock down, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.



Scenario 2:

Johnny and Mark get into a fist fight after school.

1959 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins.. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.

2009 - Police called and SWAT team arrives -- they arrest both Johnny and Mark. They are both charged them with assault and both expelled even though Johnny started it.

Scenario 3:

Jeffrey will not be still in class, he disrupts other students.

1959 - Jeffrey sent to the Principal's office and given a good paddling by the Principal. He then returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.

2009 - Jeffrey is given huge doses of Ritalin. He becomes a zombie. He is then tested for ADD. The school gets extra money from the state because Jeffrey has a disability.

Scenario 4:

Billy breaks a window in his neighbor's car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.


1959 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college and becomes a successful businessman.

2009 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy is removed to foster care and joins a gang. The state psychologist is told by Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy's mom has an affair wit h the psychologist.

Scenario 5:

Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.

1959 - Mark shares his aspirin with the Principal out on the smoking dock.

2009 - The police are called and Mark is expelled from school for drug violations. His car is then searched for drugs and weapons.

Scenario 6:

Pedro fails high school English.

1959 - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English and goes to college.

2009 - Pedro's cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against the state school system and Pedro's English teacher. English is then banned from core curriculum. Pedro is given his diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.

Scenario 7:

Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from the Fourth ofJuly, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle and blows up a red ant bed.

1959 - Ants die.

2009- ATF, Homeland Security and the FBI are all called. Johnny is charged with domestic terrorism. The FBI investigates his parents -- and all siblings are removed from their home and all computers are confiscated. Johnny's dad is placed on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.

Scenario 8:

Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.

1959 - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.

2009 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy.


And it will only get worse! - We have met the enemy - and he be us........

<BLOCKQUOTE style="BORDER-RIGHT: medium none; PADDING-RIGHT: 0in; BORDER-TOP: medium none; PADDING-LEFT: 4pt; MARGIN-BOTTOM: 5pt; PADDING-BOTTOM: 0in; MARGIN-LEFT: 3.75pt; BORDER-LEFT: blue 1.5pt solid; PADDING-TOP: 0in; BORDER-BOTTOM: medium none">After serious & cautious consideration...your contract of friendship has been renewed for the New Year 2009!




</BLOCKQUOTE>
It was a very hard decision to make, so try not to screw it up!!!

My Wish for You in 2009


May peace break into your house and may thieves come to steal your debts.

May the pockets of your jeans become a magnet for $100 bills.

May love stick to your face like Vaseline and may laughter assault your lips!
May your clothes smell of success like smoking tires and may happiness slap you across the face and may your tears be that of joy. May you find the joy of the Lord spilling out of your cup and overflowing your saucer as you share your life with all those God brings into your path.
May the problems you had forget your home address! In simple words...

May 2009 be the best year of your life!!!


















<BLOCKQUOTE></BLOCKQUOTE>

PEACE BE WITH YOU
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> As you well know, we are getting closer
>>> to my birthday. Every year there is
>>> a celebration in my honor and I think
>>> that this year the celebration will be
>>> repeated.
>>>
>>> During this time, there are many people
>>> shopping for gifts, there are many
>>> radio announcements, TV commercials, and
>>> in every part of the world everyone
>>> is talking that my birthday is getting
>>> closer and closer.
>>>
>>> It is really very nice to know, that, at
>>> least once a year, some people think
>>> of me.
>>>
>>> As you know, the celebration of my
>>> birthday began many years ago.
>>>
>>> At first, people seemed to understand
>>> and
>>> be thankful of all that I did for
>>> them; but in these times, no one seems
>>> to
>>> know the reason for the
>>> celebration.
>>>
>>> Family and friends get together and have
>>> a lot of fun, but they don't know
>>> the meaning of the celebration. I
>>> remember that last year there was a great feast in my honor. The dinner
>>> table was full of delicious foods, pastries, fruits, assorted nuts and
>>> chocolates. The decorations were exquisite and there were many, many
>>> beautifully wrapped gifts.
>>>
>>> But, do you want to know something? I
>>> wasn't invited.
>>>
>>> I was the guest of honor and they didn't
>>> remember to send me an invitation.
>>>
>>> The party was for me, but when that
>>> great
>>> day came, I was left outside, they
>>> closed the door in my face .. and I
>>> wanted to be with them and share their table.
>>>
>>> In truth, that didn't surprise me
>>> because
>>> in the last few years, all close
>>> their doors to me. Since I wasn't
>>> invited, I decided to enter the party without making any noise. I went
>>> in
>>> and stood in a corner.
>>>
>>> They were all drinking; there were some
>>> who were drunk and telling jokes and
>>> laughing at everything. They were having

>>> a grand time.
>>>
>>> To top it all, this big fat man all
>>> dressed in red wearing a long white
>>> beard entered the room yelling Ho-Ho-Ho!
>>> He seemed drunk. He sat on the
>>> sofa and all the children ran to him,
>>> saying: "Santa Claus, Santa Claus" as
>>> if the party were in his honor!
>>>
>>> At midnight, all the people began to hug
>>> each other; I extended my arms
>>> waiting for someone to hug me and do you
>>> know no-one hugged me.
>>>
>>> Suddenly, they all began to share gifts.
>>> They opened them one by one with
>>> great expectation. When all had been
>>> opened, I looked to see if, maybe,
>>> there was one for me. What would you
>>> feel if on your birthday everybody
>>> shared gifts and you did not get one?
>>>
>>> I then understood that I was unwanted at
>>> that party and quietly left.
>>>
>>> Every year, it gets worse. People only
>>> remember the gifts, the parties, to
>>> eat and drink, and nobody remembers me.
>>>
>>> I would like this Christmas that you
>>> allow me to enter into your life.
>>>
>>> I would like that you recognize the fact
>>> that almost two thousand years ago
>>> I came to this world to give my life for
>>> you, on the cross, to save you.
>>>
>>> Today, I only want that you believe this
>>> with all your heart.
>>>
>>> I want to share something with you. As
>>> many didn't invite me to their party,
>>> I will have my own celebration, a
>>> grandiose party that no one has ever imagined, a spectacular party. I'm
>>> still making the final arrangements..
>>>
>>> Today, I am sending out many invitations
>>> and there is an invitation for you.
>>> I want to know if you wish to attend and
>>> I will make a reservation for you
>>> and write your name with golden letters
>>> in my great guest book.
>>>
>>> Only those on the guest list will be
>>> invited to the party.
>>>
>>> Those who don't answer the invite, will
>>> be left outside. Be prepared because
>>> when all is ready you will be part of
>>> my
>>> great party.
>>>
>>> See you soon. I Love you!
>>>
>>> Jesus
>>>
>>> Share this message with your loved ones
>>> before Christmas.

One day
a mother died.
And
on that clear, cold morning,
in the warmth of her
bedroom,
the
daughter was
struck with
the
pain of learning that sometimes
there isn't any more.

No
more hugs,
no
more lucky moments to celebrate together,
no
more phone calls just to chat,
No
more 'just one minute'

Sometimes,
what we care about the most goes away.
never
to return before we can say good-bye,
Say
'I Love You.'

So
while we have it . . it's best we love it . .
And
care for it and fix it when it's broken
and
take good care of it when it's sick.

This
is true for marriage
....
and friendships .

And
children with bad report cards;
And
dogs with bad hips;
And
Aging parents and grandparents
We
keep them because they are worth it,
Because
we cherish them!


Some
things we keep --
like
a best friend who moved away
or
a classmate we grew up with.
There
are just some things that
make
us
happy,
No
matter what.


Life is important,
and
so are the people we know
And
so, we keep them close!
I
received this from someone today
who
thought I was a 'KEEPER'!

Then
I sent It to the people I think
of in the same way!
Now
it's your turn to send this to all those people
who Are
'keepers' in your life!

Thank
you very much for being a special part of MY Life!









Be
kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some
kind of
battle.....